I’ve just finished watching a GE commercial and decided I really want an Elephant. Not a full blown adult elephant, that’d be too much commitment and rearranging of furniture. Who are we kidding? I’m not ready for that.

LIAR

I’m not usually a very good liar. Whatever I’m thinking shows on my face. I hope this doesn’t play on my face as in, “Hey you Half Wits you’ve put handcuffs on Casper.” I hope I only look dizzy and confused, I certainly feel it. I want an elephant to sit in my heart, my head, and feed peanuts to while it looks at me with kind eyes that lack the brevity of a one night stand and has the endurance of Lance Armstrong during his training days.

So after a mishap, after advising someone, after dancing during the hours I should have been sleeping, after running and a visit to the gym, after dealing with “The Monsters”, after watching The Derby, after all was said and done, I stopped. And realized I really may be the stupidest girl alive.

Saturday morning I picked myself up. More bruises. Oh good. It wasn’t going to be mere high-necked T-shirts this time; I was going to need an all-over bodysuit plus a bag over my head. It had slid in easily through the gaps in the impedimenta (sorry, this stuff brings out the worst in my vocabulary, it’s like every bad novel and hyperbolic myth I’ve ever read crowding round to haunt me in three dimensions) trying to run with me into the rain. But this time I stopped. I’m learning to see things I haven’t seen before. I’m learning to listen to the words of my friends instead of being a stubborn bull on a train to disaster. I’m learning to not settle for less than I give. I’m learning that you should be as good to me, if not bettah, and I should never question where you stand. I’m learning to look out for me, in a twisted way, I’m looking out for you too.

Tired, but alive is going to have to do.

I’ll start making sense again one of these days.