Posted by: canaryinacoalmine | January 18, 2005

Troubled

Can’t sleep and cant stay awake enough to talk on the phone. This roomate thing is really bothering me – as I want to believe so strongly there is a good person buried deep with in the depths of her soul. Is it her heart that beats so strong and loud it echoes into my room? Or is it the childish laughter I share with her that makes me not want to give up on this friendship?We are not sheep or cows when we refuse to like someone – but when they embarass you time and time again… I suppose what makes each friend different is evident in each smile they give. Sure she’s an attractive gal and will get you attention but substance will get you time. And afterall that is what we want, correct? Lengthy life, relationships, wealth, health, sunsets, daydreams and dinners. The rarity of the combination is so evident that I have a tear reserved specifically for each moment when I see this uniqueness in my true friends. I do not try to define my true friends but I hold enough wisdom to see the objective characteristics that make up solely what and who they are. I am still torn to let the friendship go and lose the roomate or to thank her for resisting the temptation to lose herself in the crowd, lower her inhibitions and act … … like a twit – crap I think I just answered the question.

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