Posted by: canaryinacoalmine | November 27, 2005

Touch The Sky

Wednesday afternoon the car shifted into park and my throat released an empty sigh as the ignition turned off. The car door slammed shut nearly missing my blazer. Before I could breathe another breath six small arms were wrapped around my waist and thighs excited to see me.

S:Aunt Jessie.
M:I missed you
N:Ant Dese

Their love is pure and innocent. They know nothing about me other than I adore them and would steal the moon from the sky if only they asked.

M:Its a nice day. Look at my new bike
S:Yeah Yeah. Can we go for a bike ride?

J:Only because its a beautiful day
and I want to jump up and kiss the sky.

Hours later my brother was voicing back to me all my fears and doubts. Theres a difference between brothers and guy friends. A guy friend, a.k.a. a buddy will tell you when you need to stop worrying about the breaking point. A brother will tell you what to do and not think twice about calling you out. Hell tell you everything your buddies and girlfriends wont because they know how you restrain yourself. And when you do indeed take that chance, well, your friends are shocked and applaud. But your brother, will tell you that sometimes you do indeed need to refrain.

Big Brother: Youre a dumb ass for going to dinner with (insert ex boyfriend name). But youre gonna do what your gonna do. And Ill be here Mesyica.


In true fairy tale fashion, I danced my cares away later that night.

Thursday was Thanksgiving and a grand time. I woke Friday morning at 6:00 A.M. to my parents stirring and asking me if I was ready to, “Shop till I dropped and then crawl.

Ahh, thats where I get it from.

I left them later that day for a meeting and plans made earlier in the week.

J:Make a right hand turn when you cross over the parkway. It looks like the French Quarter on a slow night.

I was giving directions to my companion for the evening while standing outside enjoying the 70 degree weather. Two minutes later, a dark black vehicle with shiny wheels that spun like diamonds pulled in front of me. The car stopped. Out jumped a man wearing a white blazer and crisp white pants. Under the blazer was a pressed button down orange shirt. The top three buttons lazily hung undone to reveal a necklace that popped against the contrast of his bare chest. His swagger was slow and deliberate as he spun around the vehicle allowing brown alligator shoes to hit the pavement. Click. Click. His nick name is Hotter Than Usher.

HTU:Hey, good to see ya.
J:You too. Um, nice Escalade.
HTU:Yeahh yeahh. I just got these dubs.
J:Oh, thats what theyre called.

His voice is smooth like water falling down a rock. It’s thick and reminds me of a doberman labrador mixture paired with Puerto Rican jive. His words end with an aimless CHA inebriating the air.

We went to see Kanye West for his Touch The Sky Tour. We danced, jumped, and threw our hands in the air while marveling at Kanyes fine choice of old school R&B mixture. Somewhere in between getting home at 4am and dancing in the hood he whispered in my ear,

HTU: Just reach. You can touch the sky.

Tread softly. I’m learning.


  1. Yo Sizzle,

    It was a great show with snapping effects.

    Ya gotta reach.


  2. Hmm, don’t take this the wrong way, but, I’m with your brother on this one. We all make choices everyday. Not all of them leave marks and some cut deeper than others. Sometimes they leave scars you can see, sometimes, they leave scars that you can’t.
    Still, have to make those choices or they get made for us.

    Ah, holiday ennui… It brings out the bitter, cynical poet in all of us, no?

  3. I’m with your brother too, but I hope you find *someway* to stay warm on your trip.

  4. interseting comparison of brothers vs guy friends. i suppose the same can be said of women, although my sister is just coming of age where she feels comfortable speaking to me on the level.

    and damn, sass, 4am? i must be getting old.

    by the way, why must i insert my email address for each post?

  5. Hey stranger, I think i saw you at the kanye concert… were you looking for your car in the parking lot??? Hope all is well…

  6. you description of his voice is swoon-worthy…nice. 🙂

  7. i love the pics of you and your family.

  8. J.P. “Ya know.”

    N.G. So profound on a Monday. I’ve got lots of make up and loads of neosporin to heal those scars. The one’s that don’t heal – yeah – I’ll cover those up.

    Justin – be good now.

    D.B. – Yeah let’s just say I was more than slow the next day. In NYC the bars close at 6am. So we are kind of fortunate here in Texas the bars close earlier. Well, our livers are anyway. We were just having so much fun in the hood. (giggles). Try using the remember me button below so you won’t have to retype your email every time. Or it could be a glitch in moveable type.

    D.E. – I’m always losing something. You should have hollared at me.

    Amanda – thank-you. His voice has nothing on Marvin Gaye.

    Ghost: Thanks they were memorable times.

  9. why do i need to remeber me?


    was it in nyc? huh, i hadn’t understood that. thought you were in h-town.

    yeah, i lived in the big apple for a few years. i remember it well…

    ah, those were the days.

  10. NYC to El Paso?

  11. It’s interesting what friends will and won’t tell you and what family will and won’t. I guess that’s why we need both.

  12. no, it went more like austin to dallas to houston to nyc to dallas to el paso.

    wait, i never said el paso. where did you get that?

  13. As I write this I realize it sounds some what stalkerish but I do have a site meter on my template.

  14. Hmph, Monday-morning profundity is the opiate of the masses.

    Cover up the scars, hell! Wear ’em proud. Each one is a reminder that we survived something. Usually, something that few know about and fewer still understand. At the very least, each one is a story. If you find someone brave enough to sit still and listen to your stories, don’t let ’em go.

  15. N.G. Good point. I guess cover them up is a bad way to state such. I’ve had a lot of crap in my life some I solicited and some was happenstance. I’ve never been one to play victim or allow things to beat me down after all, One’s past is the only thing you truly own in this life.

    As far as brave men go, well that’s a story waiting to be written.

  16. actually, i own a pretty cool set of steak knives, too.

  17. Laughing. Still Laughing.

  18. So, was this a real guy? I’m confused.

  19. Yes, he is a friend of mine that has a certain genesequa quality that casts a spell over everyone he comes into contact with.

  20. Oh, your “stalker tools” aren’t foolproof, BTW. 😉

    Of course, most folk aren’t likely to have spent time avoiding their crazy ex-wives the way I had to and haven’t picked up the mad skillz that keep food on my little table, either.

  21. yeah, my stalker tool says weird things sometimes…

  22. Well, in my case, I’m using a different “anti-stalker tool”, if you will, to make it look like the last two comments were from Amsterdam and Prague, respectively. This one should say that I’m in New York.
    See, when “Geek” is half your name, this is what you do instead of edit graphics, like I should be doing! :

  23. i think i need one of them ther stalker tools…

  24. that sucks. i don’t think that my blogger allows me to require people to post with an email address. damn.

  25. Lovin’ it – nice descriptions.

    I feel all hot and bothered – is that bad?

    Ben O.

  26. My stalker tools are old skool… *criss-crossing the parkway*

  27. Yeah, so are mine, but I think we mean that differently, Mr. Tinyhands. I use ping, tracert, nslookup and whois to track down where my visitors come from on my website. And, I try to resist the urge to connect physical addresses to the virtual ones. People get funny about that, I’m told.

  28. man, you guys are pretty serious about tracking people. what’s the big deal? who cares where your posters are?

  29. Hmm, well, you’ve never gotten threats via e-mail or blog, have you? See, I like to know if someone in my neighborhood is threatening to come “kick my ass” or if it’s just a guy running his mouth in, say, Phoenix. Also, occasionally, it’s nice to be able to trace things down to physical addresses for assorted legal reasons.

    Besides, look at how I sign my comments. This kind of stuff is what I do for a living.


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