Posted by: canaryinacoalmine | December 5, 2005

On Fire

New Years Eve is a crock.

Iíll type it again.

New Year Eve is a crock accentuating only the ill contrived one pump chump enjoyment. It reminds me of The Choker and being left on the side of the road like a piece trash thrown out the window. Thatís another story for another time. I’m digging deep here and showing vulnerable, vacillating between revealing my past and present with you. It hurts the way walking across hot coals burn your core while the farenheit rises on your personal gadge releasing a blind gas.

Now you know, my nightmares.

I digress

Perhaps, New Years Eve used to mean more. Iím not talking Farmers Almanac and gold star awards for a Pulitzer Novel but letís face it, trying to derive a reason to get drunk, dress up, make noise, and wear funny hats is about as meaningful as drinking Sleepy Time tea to go to sleep.


There are nights itís necessary because the voice wonít stop like the calendar continues to turn. The pages peel away from the binding and ground the inevitable external mourning. Indeed, it does go faster as you age. I blinked and my childhood was ripped away like a check I forgot to cash.

It keeps getting better, right?


  1. Is this like when you text message someone and they don’t write back?

  2. sass, i think you should lay off the sleepy time.

    and, if you think your new years is gonna suck, try spending it on call.

  3. Rough weekend?
    Or did you see an old beau with a new girl?
    Or is it just that the Holiday Spirit left you feeling a bit hung over?

    When things get really bad at this time of year, I remind myself that things could always be worse, and, in fact, have been worse. Then, I say a little prayer:
    “God, when I can’t be thankful for what you’d given me, at least let me remember to be thankful for what you’ve spared me.”
    At least I’m not married to the Harpy anymore!

    If you still need a laugh, go listen to SmooveB. That ought to give you a good guffaw.

  4. No, it actually gets worse and then we get old and no one likes us anymore. Cant wait.

  5. I have never been a New Years fan. I have said time and time again, it’s much ado about nothing. A whole lot of build-up for literally, one second of celebration.
    I loved your writing in this, particularly the image of the book binding. Nice work.

  6. hey girl, i am definitely down for a december 22nd latte. email me! yay!

  7. it will.

  8. I hope it gets better!!! You just need the right plans for New Years. Like for instance, coming to Oshkosh!!!

  9. I bet that if you found Karla Babble and hung out with her for New Year’s, you’d have a wonderful time!

  10. Only if Karla doesn’t boil her baby.


  11. I am going camping in the Hill Country that weekend. Wanna leave all the bling bling behind for some nature time roasting marshmellows by a campfire?

  12. About ten years ago New Years Eve was very special. For 5 years in a row I was able to see my closest friends at the time and spend a hell of a night. One year it was Retarted Elf at Fitzgerald’s, another year a house party deep deep in the woods (I kept looking over my shoulder for the freak in the hockey mask and machete), and I can’t remember the other three off hand. I’d have to consult my scrapbooks. Now, I’ve worked every new years for the past 5 years and ran my ass off. This year I have to work it, but it will be in the daytime. My new set of friends have to work that night. I may try to go see them. I more than likely will be sober (dammit) will anyone else?

  13. Jason, I’ll probably be clean and sober on New Year’s Eve. In fact, I’ll probably be in bed early, like I was for years when I was married/involved/whatever. Safer than being on the street with the drunks! Though, I have been known to simply out-wait the drunks and drive home for breakfast…

  14. I wish I could figure this whole New Year’s thing out as well. Maybe it’s as simple as spending some quality time with someone really special. I’d take that in a heartbeat.

  15. Okay, here’s a look into obesessive-compulsive disorder:
    “one pump chump” rang a bell and I couldn’t get that out of my head since I read it. Now, taking a break from the relentless Photoshopping that I have to do for work, I googled and found It’s a ska band!

    That and, somehow, having someone in your past nicknamed “The Choker” seemed like there’s a lot more past that you don’t share than I realized. And the fact that I suddenly want to take care of you and Reagan and everyone I read about that’s having a rough holiday season says something about my personality and why I end up everyone’s Uncle Jim. Oh, well, it could be worse.


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