Posted by: canaryinacoalmine | February 14, 2006

love on repeat

Growing up in a family of five kids we learned the art of sharing and compromise at an early age. When cake was involved the lesson was simple. One child cuts the cake and the other chooses their piece. Id soon begin to break down this rule scraping off only the icing and offering the mass of cake to my brothers and try to negotiate a trade. Last 4th of July Ronda and I attended a barbecue with Sarah, Fe, Bryan and some of the K.C. Crew. R. and I spotted a mound of cupcakes. With a twinkle in our eyes I moved towards the plastic spoons and she reached for a cupcake. Several scrapes and licks later the cupcake was declared icing-less.

I’m always scraping the sweetness off life like I do cake.

Try as I may to hate today and all the consumer driven emphasis placed on the proclamation of love. I simply cant, Im a sucker for the holiday.

Earlier this evening while talking to Soleil we were discussing crushes and those well never admit potential possibility. Admission of itself round this circle of gals is enough to have Continental Airlines on speed dial.

Several weeks ago I looked at Kristina after Dr. Dreamy left the table,You look happy. Really happy.
Tossing her head back and laughing she joked, I dont know what youre talking about.

Do we become more cautious as we age learning to tread lightly through the first several months of new relations? Or does one dive right in day dreaming of white dresses and decorated pews forgetting forever is just that? Theres never any way to be sure exactly how these balance out.

Im feeling quite cagey recalling previous Valentines. I once spent Valentines with a man who gambled in all areas of his life. We failed when he gambled with the wrong gal.

Once I spent a Valentines with a man who made me dinner. I bit my tongue upon seeing the Eatzis cartons in his trash. Pure honesty works much better but, this man was addicted to shortcuts with no regard to risk. We failed when he took a risk on our relationship hoping I would never learn of the other.

Once I spent Valentines with a man I had been infatuated with prior to us dating. Occasionally Id experienced a nagging feeling he was hiding some sort of criminal behavior. One time in particular Id been convinced he was going to tell me something terrible and nearly cancelled our date. He told me he loved me instead. Which, in retrospect was a crime in and of itself. We failed too.

Soleil suggested we change the name of Valentines to, Meet Me at the Bar Day. Forgo the wink and buy me a drink Day. Im failing to mention she was on her way to Hallmark at the time.

Telling yourself today is shit is like an anesthetic, and when you stop taking the Advil, you really can feel how much love and personal relations impact our lives. Without love; life would hurt. Perhaps, Im only trying to ignore theres no one who will eat the cake after Ive scraped the icing, but today is not only for LOVERS or LUVAHS (there is a difference) its also for friends, family, and throwing your diet out the door to eat icing.

My office may find it strange if I show up at work today in a hot air balloon but I simply LOVE -LOVE.

Happy Valentines Day.


  1. I wish I understood Japanese. I am thinking that either the girl finally gets the guy, or the guy is a jerk and it took the whole music video for him to realize what a git he is.

    As for V-day, you’ve had some interesting ones. It’s great that you still have a good attitude about it. I guess I’ve been lucky. Every Valentine’s Day that I’ve spent with a girlfriend/date has always worked out pretty well.

  2. What is not to love about love? It is the thing we all seek, we all desire and it really is the reason for getting up in the morning…I pity people who need a special day every year to remind them of just that.

  3. “Do we become more cautious as we age learning to tread lightly through the first several months of new relations? Or does one dive right in day dreaming of white dresses and decorated pews? Theres never any way to be sure exactly how these balance out. ”

    I’ve thrown caution to the wind finally. I feel good about that but it’s not working. You’re right. It’s a fine line. A mystery I may never solve.

  4. Sass, it’s a lovely post and a lovely sentiment. (And a funny video!)

    I try not to hold on too tightly to anything anymore. Love, like anything else, comes and goes. I refuse to believe that I’ve never been in love or been loved, all evidence to the contrary not withstanding. But, now, today, I try not to worry about holding on to any of it quite so tightly. It ebbs and flows, like the tide.
    I hope your day swells with love, or a reasonable substitute.

    Every year is a new chance, after all. One day, your prince will come…

  5. You know the real irony is I used to scrap the icing off just so that I could enjoy the cake.

    Happy Valentines Day, gorgeous.

  6. hmmm…i guess my past suggestion about eatzi’s met with a thud. oh well, happy valentine’s day sass.

  7. I love love as well. I want to hate this day and it’s couple-y overkill, BUT when I was part of a couple I loved it. And I still love it, despite my best efforts.

    Happy Valentine’s Day, Jess!!

  8. i just jump. and hope i either land on my feet or that she’ll catch me.

  9. I used to love love, but it’s bitten me on the ass too much lately, so I’m a grumpy cynical bastard on this day. Your post lightened my mood a bit, though, so thank you, and Happy Valentine’s Day to you!

  10. I’m pimping people out over on my little space today – would you like me to add you to the list? It’s just a meet-me-at-the-bar thing anyway 🙂 I hope you have a great day!!!

  11. @-`-,

  12. I agree that we should celebrate love, all kinds of love. But shouldn’t we do it every day? Oh well, we have today for all love…and chocolate too.

  13. wtf? did my comment get edited? I originally typed:

    I am thinking that either the girl is a stalker that finally gets the guy, or the guy is a jerk and it took the whole music video for him to realize what a git he is.

  14. It took me a while to realize that TH sent you a flower…

    Happy Valentine’s Day!

  15. Brota,

    I don’t know what you are talking about. However, my site is no place for such negativity. If you have something to discuss please email me at


  16. Happy Valentines Day Miss Sass

  17. Happy V-Day, girl!

    I got your comment but I deleted it cause you used my real name and I’m still doing that “anonymous blogger” thing. lol

  18. I agree that today is for all kinds of love. I was delighted to come home yesterday and find that the flower delivery guy had some by with a bouquet for me…from one of my oldest and dearest girlfriends. That’s just good stuff. 🙂 Have a great Valentine’s Day, Jess!

  19. Hmmm I am with you… Valentine’s is fun when you have someone to share it with… and it is so easy to just sit and say it is a sucker Holiday… but really what is wrong with getting treated great one day of the year just because Hallmark says you have to? I think it is great.


  20. I’m sorry to have a small chuckle at your expense, but I had to laugh a little when you summed up your previous Valentine’s Day dates. I feel for ya. So this year, here is to you finding a man who won’t gamble with your heart, who will do his best to cook you dinner even if he has zero chef skills and a guy who’s criminal past is not only clean, but his ability to gauge the perfect timing to saying I love you…not too much too soon frightening you away.

    Of course, I suppose a night out with your girlfriends licking icing isn’t a bad way to spend this holiday either. 🙂

  21. It was hardly negative. It was just a joke.

    Unless you were talking about my second comment. That wasn’t negativity either…just confusion.

  22. Happy Valentine’s Day to you! I agree with you sentiments for the day, but I dispise the driving force of the retail establishment for the day.

  23. Well put. And while I’m still trying to dull the pain…I bloated my tummy by eating too many cupcakes at the office. To each their own.

  24. Hey Babe! Happy Belated Valentine’s Day! I have had a little cold and am just not getting back to blogging.. Your picture below by the way looks absolutely stunning!
    Hope you have a great day!


  25. this was really beautiful and insightful. then again..most of your posts are. Happy Valentine’s Day (although belated)

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